Anticipation

i dont like this feeling.
i dont like this feeling and the way its making me feel.
i dont like this feeling and the way its making me feel towards distress.

i feel like a creep,
a useless creep,
i want to feel special,
but i dont belong anywhere near them.

i want this pressure to stop pressuring me.
i want this feeling to stop making me feel this way.

i know im not what you wanted me to be.
but blame yourself,
you made me this way.
i could change myself,
but its hard.

i know im not the best,
im trying.
im trying to make you proud of me.
im trying to make other people proud of me,
not because of you,
not because of your name,
not because of your title,
or your post.

what the hell am i doing.

i cant lie to myself.
i dont like it at all.
im just trying to satisfy you.
but i just want to be me

yes it happened

4 months,exactly 4 months ;)

well minus the break up, its been 3 years,exactly 3 years.

i love you ajmal. thanks for being there for me. ;)

Could I Care Less

and so the story goes. BLA BLA BLA. the hell? do i look like i care? excuse me little muffins, i've got a better life now,so thanks for moving ;)

i've got better things to do, than go all gugu gaga over you

and please dont interfere little one,u dont know what i have to go through, so dont act like u know everything abt me,u dont.

betrayed,lied to,ripped of, and backstabbed. showed me what life is. Thanks God for showing me the real her. ALHAMDULILLAH. ;)

and yes to you it might not be your fault. but the coin has two different sides my dear. never the same. nothing i said was never good enough, and everything u did was any better. ;)